", In 2011, Soderland, then 34 and working as a documentary producer, woke up in the early hours of the morning in her flat in east London with an excruciating headache. You talked about acceptance. Now, after the success of My Beautiful Broken Brain, they see the value of story-telling for brain-injured people. Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies. Also, I think that speech and language therapy is such an amazing and helpful job to help people regain their communication skills which is a fundamental part of life. Mrs Tan said: Right now, a year on, my language skill is like a primary three student. An excruciating pain in my head woke me up in the early hours. After that I just became really interested in his films. And some risks are worth it. In the first three or four months, I was recording everything that was happening through the day, because I was so fascinated by it and because I had problems with short-term memory. With a black hood pulled up to hide her surgery scar, she haltingly says, Okay, Im alive, then smiles and gives the camera a thumbs-up. Knowing that was not the answer, Mr Tan insisted for more tests and scans which subsequently revealed a dilated pupil and a blood clot in her brain, indicating signs of a stroke. Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, SE1 9GF. We sent that link through his agent, and other means of contact. I was looking at my clothes and I knew that I needed them, but I didnt quite know how they worked.. Denzel Washington, Chris Pratt and Ethan Hawke are among the gang, Based on the 1997 Loomis Fargo Robbery in North Carolina, this comedy comes from the man behind Napoleon Dynamite. 2023 Cond Nast. [3], The film starts with a recap of the intracerebral hemorrhage (stroke) and subsequent emergency brain surgery on her parietal and temporal lobes, and follows the life of its protagonist, London resident Lotje Sodderland, in the year that followed, documenting the progress of her recovery and the major setbacks she experienced. Even listening to the radio is quite overwhelming. She realizes that she needs to come into terms with her new reality, focus on the essential and on the new things she has discovered. Thoughts occurred to me. Whats not to like? But it also helped me to recover the narrative aspect of my mind and brain -the ability to tell stories, in a visual way. Five years ago, one of those peoplewas Lotje Sodderland, who woke up to what she describes as a 'new planet', following an unprovoked bleed of the brain at the age of just34. I remember at one stage wanting to die because the pain was so intense. Lotje: Im really fortunate to be born with an optimistic personality, and that really helped me as I kept thinking that everything was going to be OK and that the illness is actually not terrible. As Mrs Tan became closer with some of the fellow participants, the couple even started a WhatsApp group for them to continue chatting outside of Chit Chat Cafe. My brother and I have always been close and, after we left home, we lived very near each other. Lotje, what did David Lynch mean to you before your stroke?LS: I got into Twin Peaks when I was a teenagerreally, really into Twin Peaks. Sometimes, it is not about choosing to be positive but to understand and acknowledge that you have been hit with a mental condition or illness and working your way out of it is going to be very tough. After waking, I was diagnosed with aphasia, which affects your cognition and communication skills, and homonymous hemianopsia-meaning I'dlost almost all the vision in my right eye. Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, SE1 9GF. Videos [1][2], David Lynch became an executive producer of the film. It could have happened at any time. When you were filming yourself on your phone, did you think of that footage as something you might eventually make use of?LS: No. Expect major face-palming from Trekkies in July. Lotje Sodderland explores beauty and positivity after a traumatic health scare At age 34, film director Lotje Sodderland was struck by an intracerebral haemorrhagic stroke after a night out with her friends. I still cant read for more than a few minutes at a time (these words are brought to you courtesy of Siri), but I see more of the world; a world that may not always have left-to-right linear patterns, but is intuited instead through subtle sensory experience. [1] Start your Independent Premium subscription today. I have no idea how I walked down four flights of stairs, orhow I found myself across the street in a hotel, trying to ask the receptionists for help. Three years ago she suffered a stroke herself. She has a new partner, a new job as a film-maker and cinematographer and is excited for the future. It seemed entirely impossible that I would be able to love someone else and even more improbable that someone would love the damaged new me. To look at me, you wouldnt have noticed a thing. Sodderland co-directed the multiple award-winning feature film 'My Beautiful Broken Brain' (executive produced by David Lynch), which is her own . He knows putting his name on it would help us in terms of getting the film recognized. *Names changed as requested by the couple. I am very fortunate that my friends and family are very loving and supportive. I never had any limits: travelling widelyand generally being very active. But I didn't feel any fear. He basically said how excited he was by my brain. Aphasia SG is a not-for-profit organisation supporting persons with aphasia and their caregivers. Our relationship professionally really developed once Id had the stroke. Im grateful to have learnt so much more about the challenges of being human - so early on. To keep up her motivation, Mrs Tan sets new targets and uses creative means to practise at home. Shed had a brain hemorrhage, the result she would eventually find out, of a vascular abnormality that developed before birth. You evolved in what is a very unusual way. But I used diagrams and drawings and eventually he understood. When he dropped me off at the station I said: Ithink were going to fall in love, and he said: Ithink so, too.. I spent three months as an inpatient at a rehabilitation centre, receiving physical, psychological and linguistic therapy. We seeLotje struggle with the first sessions of cognitive evaluation and speech therapy, the embarrassment from not being able to remember simple word, her nervous laughter, her apologies for not making a lot of sense, her courageoussmile turning into uncontrollable tears of frustration and sadness. Lotje Sodderland was a digital producer at a hip London creative agency when she suffered a stroke that decimated her language skills and threw her sensory perception into disarray. Things change constantly for everybody. Upon returning home, Mrs Tan, who was once fluent in English, Mandarin, and Teochew, would practise speech and language exercises up to eight hours a day with her husband to regain her communication capabilities. She became very quiet and withdrawn, while my brother went into saviour mode and wanted to do many things but yet, did not know how. There is no silence more resounding than that of a cognitive communication malfunction. The world is much more visual and much less cognitive. Doing simple daily activities such as accessing your bank account or doing anything bank-related after a brain injury can be so complicated. But also I used it just on a practical level, to remember things, like meetings with doctors, and to communicate with friends, because I couldnt read or write. Even doing supposedly normal tasks like making a cup of tea or using a cash machine just seemed to have no coherent structure, or logic, for me. I woke to the sound of nurses by my bed, discussing their Christmas plans. Eventually, hours later, I managed to get to the hotel across the street and was found unconscious in the toilets. After suffering a stroke at age 34, a woman documents her struggles, setbacks and eventual breakthrough as she relearns to speak, read and write. But no more than the average Lynch fan. Still unable to speak coherently, Sodderland wanted to get in touch with Sophie Robinson, a documentary film-maker she had met once through work, but had forgotten her name and had no way of articulating who she was. Lotjeis a fighter and she has the good fortune to have access to therapy. Lotje Sodderlands long journey to a happy life with what she calls her new brain began early on a November morning in 2011. But I felt like I was in the world he created in his films. "But I knew that I'd need some help.". I put it on Vimeo with a password. But I said nothing, swimming through torrents of wordless creosote, fearing my speech would be unintelligible. Dutch-French filmmaker Lotje Sodderland didn't know young people could suffer from a stroke - until she had one herself in 2011, then aged 34. I want to learn more words to argue and feel more like a married couple So, I am going to keep practising until I succeed, she laughed. Lotje Sodderland is on Facebook. Lotje: When an illness like that hits suddenly, it is very difficult for a person to adjust to the new condition as you lose all the elements of who you are job, independence, and even your ability to communicate. Then reality hits. The day of the stroke was fairly typical for me - a Sunday in November 2011. I took meditation and mindfulness classes at a Buddhist centre near my home. In 2013, Lorna Smalley was rushed to hospital with encephalitis, an inflammation of the brain. When did that happen?SR: Netflix had come on board, and suddenly we were in a very real situation, where the film was actually going to go out globally to 190 different countries. UNIRTE AHORA En este documental, descubriremos por qu David Lynch tuvo un papel clave en la recuperacin de Lotje Sodderland. Before the stroke, I was a documentary producer in London, living in what I now realise was a very high-level cognition world. Filling in a thick form, the doctor asked me questions, occasionally glancing up to gauge my responses. Lotje Sodderland is an award winning writer and filmmaker, who started her career as a documentarian at the Institute of Public Policy Research (IPPR) and advertising agency Mother in London. I remember the cognitive psychologist drawing a diagram to indicate where on the scale my old intellect had been, and where it was now. As part of her recovery she designed a motivational psychological programme and she has now developed the app "Recovery After a Brain Injury" to help people faced with similar challenges. But at this stage the doctors couldnt tell me why Ihad lost the ability to speak, read, write or think coherently. That meant something, because the relationship that he had with Lotje was very genuine. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement and Privacy Policy and Cookie Statement and Your California Privacy Rights. My discharge date arrived in early April, but though Iwas out of hospital, my mind was stuck on my limitations. Mr Tan quit his job and poured his heart into finding the best care for his partner by doing his own research and seeking the advice of family and healthcare professionals. Thats a start.. Filmmaker Lotje Sodderland documents her recovery process from the hemorrhagic stroke she had at 34 and the new life she builds in the aftermath. When the stroke happened, I forgot his name. At Tan Tock Seng Hospital, Mr Tan was further dismayed to learn that his wifes condition was diagnosed as a drug overdose and possible suicide attempt. Two weeks after the stroke, I nearly burned the ward to a cinder when the hospital ran a standard independent living test on me (the making of tea and toast). And in the aftermath, she was transformed. Among the faculties Ihadlost was the ability to understand narrative. Her friends describe her as someone impassioned, who was busy multitasking, writing films, writing in general, always readingthick books, someone very articulate. On one hand, it's landed a cast of incredibly funny actresses, but on the other, another reboot? Starring Christian Bale, Cate Blanchett and Natalie Portman, it sees a man return home from New York and get sucked into the hollow hedonism of LA, fighting to extricate himself from it, Based on journalist Kim Barkers 2011 memoir The Taliban Shuffle: Strange Days in Afghanistan and Pakistan, this dark comedy sees Tina Fey play a foreign correspondent reporting in the Middle East during Operation Enduring Freedom, where she develops a weird relationship with a fellow journalist played by Martin Freeman, The wind seems to have gone out of the sails of the Man of Steel series in spite of the addition of a new Batman, and there's a more palpable anticipation for Suicide Squad (which arrives later in the year), Coming off the back of multi-Oscar winner Boyhood, this Richard Linklater film looks a lot like Dazed and Confused if it was set in the 80s, albeit pitched more towards comedy, Disney is trampling on its own hallowed ground with this live action remake. . I didnt sleep for days. The challenge is to rebuild your identity, Sodderland told me when I spoke with her and Robinson by phone from Austin, Texas, earlier this week. My Beautiful Broken Brainis an intensely personal story of a 34 year old woman, Lotje Sodderland, who documented through film her 1-year journey of recovery from hemorrhagic stroke, which resulted in Aphasia. She managed to get herself dressed and stumbled to a nearby hotel, before blacking out completely. It is run by a team of dedicated speech therapist volunteers. This year, I told my husband that I have a new goal I want to be able to argue with him. Self Employed. With the help of my Occupational Therapist, I could go to the bank, take out money and manage my bills which gave me a sense of accomplishment. The documentary does a great job showing thatstroke-related disability is often not only a loss of one function or another, it is a perturbation of ones entire existence, of ones self-image. Then one night she woke up with a pounding headache; stumbled out of her apartment, where she lived alone; and came to days later in the hospital. A house cleaner desperately searches for her husband as a dreaded criminal syndicate dredges up past tragedies and ultimately drives her to violence. 2016 will see a ninth X-Men film. I had no idea how to meditate and was too fragmented to listen to the teacher, but the sweet silence of the shrine room had me instantly hooked. Ninth. She woke up in her east London flat with a blinding headache and. In a post-surgery self-filmed footage, she shares her excitementof not being dead. He explained: The paramedics had seen a bottle of cough syrup in the bedroom and assumed the worst. And it still is. Lotje describes herself as hard-working, a traveler, someone who has lots of friends, someone who loves to read. I was really moved. Tom Hanks is your guy. (laughs), I had to figure out for myself that I was never going to be the same as before and find out how can I work with the new me and see the beauty and positivity in my new limitations.. I encourage patients to find creative or unique outlets to express themselves and understand their emotions in non-traditional ways other than writing and reading.